Every day I’m getting a little bit better. I only cried for about an hour today and the rest of the day I was very angry. Not an improvement in Grandmother Spider’s eyes but I think I feel better. I’ve appreciated very much the comments that I have been getting from my imaginary friends: Ken, Paul, Monica, Tia, Terhi, Pamela, Eva, Teresa Cleland, Patricia, Ed, Scott, Gloria, Diane, Darlyne Smith, Ylva, Katrina, Darla, Jackie and everyone else who I unpardonably didn’t mention because I was having a meltdown. Now you are all famous for being on my blog, read by (I’m sure) millions and millions of people.
I also thank my dogs for keeping my mind off my troubles by looking so terrible and scruffy.
I went to the Office of Mental Health who welcomed me with open arms and stated that my recovery is a partnership between them and myself to ensure my optimum health and functioning and signed my paper (which I already knew) stating the risks of therapy include “important people in your life may not support my decision to be in therapy that he or she is crazy or weak. Someone may stop associating with the person because they found out that he or she is in therapy” (my note: whether they want to be or not)
Another risk: Some health insurance companies deny coverage for the treatment of preexisting conditions.
I have to sign up with them on the web.
As for disclosures: to Blue Cross/Blue Shield business partners who need access to the information to perform administrative or professional services on my behalf or
If I am a danger to myself or others or
I die and the communication is important to decide an issue concerning a deed of conveyance, will or other writing executed by me affecting an interest in property or
I have filed suit against anyone and have claimed mental/emotional damages as part of the suit.
I am not able to have a weapon. Any kind, including mace, billy sticks or even tree branches.
Around me, people are to lock up lenghths of rope, razors, knives, lighters, etc, medications and pharmaceuticals, bleach poisons, antifreeze, etc.
People are to restrict access to motor vehicle usage, increase supervision, monitoring and active interaction, monitor warning signs such as giving away belongings, etc.
If I leave and my “safety” person (my alcoholic husband) is concerned, it is essential that he contact 911.
There is no end date on this document. Nothing that states that I can have a doctor or therapist revoke it. Since my attorney didn’t seem too concerned, I am going in to Rochester to see if there is a way to get out of it, fight it or do anything.
My main (pun there) idea is to quick find an apartment in Maine. I’m wondering if there is a caveat on my driver’s license now. Paul said he would lower the price on the house, sell it, buy me a house in Maine and then move up there. Ummmmm, what is wrong with that picture? My daughter is very upset with me. My mother thinks I only wanted to get out to have a drink. I could sue my sister for renting me half her house and then changing her mind after I was committed (which is discrimination). My youngest sister is going to get two bowling balls put into a part of her body that she prefers not to think about (just kidding Mr. Policeman!) and my oldest sister does not approve but has a new dog.
Can you tell I’m not quite as numb as I was?
Thank you everyone.