Gee, Golly, a New Post

TheodoreReynWarrisRobertsMeekerBarnHas anyone ever tried to find an official Sean Penn website for fans? How can I tell him that I really love him. Anyone that can act that well and have such a wonderful smile and help save people in Mississippi should be loved by everyone. And, to play a rock star like Cheyenne – well that was pretty special I think. Perhaps this message will get to him via the grape-vine post. This is another thing…what do you picture when you think of a grape-vine post? I think that English may be a very strange language. My mind normally is going in about ten different directions at once and when people are talking to me I must look pretty stupid because I’m thinking of all sorts of different meanings for their words. I think this is why I never could balance my check book because if you have a dollar here and have made a mistake there why can’t you correct it using that dollar that is over there? Thank goodness for online banking as long as you remember to CHECK YOUR BALANCE before using Paypal. There is another one. Check your balance when you aren’t even writing a check?
Which is why I love my dogs. We have our own special language and we understand each other completely. Perhaps in my past life I was a dog. The words are in the body language. But what happens when you are blind? Can you still have dogs? You can have horses because when you ride them, they go where they want anyway so that would be easy. Or cows would be neat because then you wouldn’t see them licking their noses. But dogs?
My foot is still broken but I insisted on a new rental. That van was like a semi. I wonder why they gave a seven seater to two people? We traded it for a Volkswagon Airbag. At least that is what it says on the dash. It’s a little sedan and has a real clock and the dials are pretty much like my Subaru’s are. The only problem is that I was so spoiled by being able to see so well in the Subaru. This one of those sedans that have smaller windows so being only 5’1″ I can’t see well over the dashboard so I have to lift the seat up which means that I have to bring the seat forward to reach the pedal which means that my knee is crammed between the seat and the steering wheel which means that I have to raise the steering wheel which means that I can’t see over the steering wheel. However, I can drive it and I suppose if I really wanted to see, I could look between the top of the steering wheel and the dash. However, who wants to see something that is aiming right at you.
I have been appointed the Huron Town Historian which, to me, is a great honor because I am now making $.67 per day. That’s right, 67 cents. I have only had time to empty one file cabinet and pull the discintigrating pictures out. If anyone has any ideas on a tactful way to ask the town to provide a self-defrosting refrigerator for the color prints and a de0-humidifier for the summer and an air conditioner, please let me know. Better yet if you would like to do a great honor for the town of Huron and are making more than 67 cents per day, you could just let me know and you may Paypal the funds to me. I will even make a plaque to honor you for the deed. Or, if you are in a good mood you may just send a donation. These pictures are important and every minute that goes by they are corroded more. And, you should know (if you didn’t) that nitrate negatives eventually spontaneously combust so check out your Kodak Safety Film to see what kind you are keeping in the closet. The most exciting thing is that I’ve found relatives. I found a composition book about my Paternal great grandmothers family. I just about had a heart attack when I saw it. So, you see, I’m getting more than 67 cents per day (or less when you consider the ink and paper it takes to copy this stuff for me). I won’t ask for donations for that because that is for me.
Well, this blog was not for anything except that I was in a bad mood and I thought this would cheer me up. I like talking to my friends and if you have read this far…you are my friend. Thank you for cheering me up!

International Happiness Day

For all of you who are enjoying International Happiness Day I just want you to know that I would like you to go jump in a lake in Alaska so that I could enjoy it, too – just by watching your expression. Or, you can slip on the ice in Maine, try to get up, slip again ad infinitum so that I can come out and help you trying to keep a straight face.
When I was young I overheard my father telling my mother that my 1st grade teacher, who lived across the street slipped on the ice and landed on her butt and when he ran over to help the poor old lady up he noticed she had a large hole in her underwear. He was laughing and I assume that I am being a good girl when I follow in my parents footsteps.
And then there was the time that my Mother and Aunt decided to walk around our 11 acre pond up North with me via the fallen logs that are on the rim. I was happy because I could jump from one end of a log to another because I was so agile. Now, what was hysterical (happiness) was when they could not and had to step down into the muck and sunk to their thighs, screaming with “not happiness” because they thought there were things under there (which there were).
Now that I’m cheering myself up (which, I assume, is the purpose of International Happiness Day) I remember being up north in the winter which was not usual because there is no electricity and in the 50s we were really “off the grid”. My older sister was always jealous of my agility. I was able to jump our white picket fence but she always caught her foot and did a face plant. Anyway, it was winter and we had our flying saucers (remember those round metal things?) and of course I went first and went down the hill slicker than a greased pig tilting to steer around the trees to the pond. Then comes my older sister. I swear she hit EVERY tree going down the hill. She was like a pin ball – bam, boom, bounce, bam. I’m sorry but I have to say that I couldn’t help her as she was lying crying at the bottom of the hill. I really, really couldn’t stop laughing. My mother and aunt came flying out the door and sliding down the hill to see if she was hurt (which she wasn’t) and each time they slipped I would start all over again. I was not happy afterwards when they blamed it on me.
Of course there was the time when the joke was on me and I was crossing Pico and Ocean with Tina in my lovely platform shoes when the platform broke and down I went in front of 50,000 people in Santa Monica but I did have to laugh at the expression on my 7 year-old daughter’s face as she took my hand and said “hurry, the walk sign shows a hand!”
Of course I could be happy because our rental car is stuck in the mud in our front yard because I couldn’t drive it anyway because I have a broken foot which happened the same day that our car was totaled. I don’t have a television but while we were waiting for things to cool off at my daughter,s I saw an advertisement that showed a smashed Subaru (which it was) and a man lifting his arms and saying “but we are alive!”.
I could be happy because my Mother was with us and she had just had a splint inserted and she ended up being calmer than my husband and I. I am NOT happy that we were taking a right turn and a car going 90-MPH passed us on the right. Am I happy that he ended up running into an electric pole?
I am happy that all four dogs are here cozy and happy that we can’t go anywhere even though I was supposed to go over to pick up some keys for my new job.
I am happy that I don’t have crutches and just have a boot so that I can carry things around with me.
I’m happy that my furnace works and that my chair is comfortable and that it may be getting closer to Spring. I can tell that because the car is stuck but I’m still keeping the drapes closed to save on oil bills (I’m not happy about that). I’m happy that I could take a shower this morning just by removing my boot even though Karla stole my shampoo bottle and I had to use my husbands shampoo. I still haven’t found it.
I will be happier when I find a place that sells single shoes. Seems like people should have a place to recycle single shoes for those of us who are impaired.
So, have a happy or unhappy International Happiness Day. You may get happier just thinking about what you have or have had to make you happy. Like me – I am happy to have known BillyBob Dog 🙂